A VERMIN FAN WRITES TO FOOTBALL 365...

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1) Why did you sell Lassana Diarra in January and keep hold of Abou Diaby and Gilberto? Yes, he wanted to go, but only because you made it clear he was further down the pecking order than very average players.


2) Why did you not spend the requisite money on Jonathan Woodgate (or another centre-half) in January, particularly after watching Philippe Senderos made to look ordinary by Birmingham of all teams?


3) Why on earth did you field a team containing Justin Hoyte and Armand Traore against ManYoo in the FA Cup when those same players had been torn apart by Tottenham?


4) Why was a game against your biggest Premier League rivals - who would clearly get a psychological boost - sacrificed?


5) Why make William Gallas your captain when there are move clear examples of leadership qualities, with Cesc Fabregas and Mathieu Flamini the two obvious alternatives?


6) Why did you refuse to spend money on a ready-made alternative to Fabregas last summer, leaving you no choice but to run him into the ground?


7) Why have you played Emmanuel Eboue game after game after game on the wing despite his effectiveness waning at the same pace as his popularity?


Why did you not buy a left-winger when it became clear that Tomas Rosicky is made of biscuits?


9) To go back to 3), why field these players again against Liverpool in the league when they have been a byword for disaster this year?


10) Why rest Emmanuel Adebayor, Alex Hleb and Gael Clichy in that league game - a tactic that pretty much guaranteed that victory would be beyond your grasp - but still play the clearly-dead-on-his-feet Fabregas?


11) In the third part of the trilogy, Why wait until you needed to score a goal before bringing on Theo Walcott and Robin van Persie? Why was your decision a reactionary one?


12) Why did you not buy a single player in January when you ended December two points clear of ManYoo but it was already abundantly clear that you were over-reliant on 13/14 key players?


13) Will you adjust for ManYoo on Sunday and play Toure at centre-half, Eboue at right-back and Walcott on the wing or stubbornly stick to the same idea?


14) Will Gilberto play in the expected absence of Flamini despite the fact that he will likely be up against the pace and power of Ronaldo, Rooney and Tevez?


15) Will you stick with the same principles and once again stubbornly refuse to spend big in the summer, refusing to compete on a level playing field as if that would somehow be cheating?

16) What do you think of the Adebayor elephant song? I understand that his father recently passed away, do you think this matters with regards to the accuracy of the song in question?

Why did you choosed to become a scum?

Why do you always hang around the playground with a packet of sweets in your hand?

Why does Pappa Adebayor wash elephants? Why doesn't he do something more fun with them like tickle their trunks or teach them how to jump through hoops?