Let's talk toilet

When I was in China this week i needed a Tom Tit. As I was travelling by train and going to various places that were 'rural' the toilets were of a local design i.e Hole In The Ground. I kept putting it off hoping I'd see a western style bog but alas not. Seeing as I had the making of a brown turtle head popping out I was a desperate man so I had no option but to do the 'squat'. It's only the second time I have done it (once in Thailand when I had a touch of the squits) and I don't think I will ever get used to the experience. Have you ever released your brown prisoners this way? Do you like it? Got used to it? I'd love to know....

Can't stand those things. Had to endure them for a full week when I climbed Kilimanjaro. In the end, decided to do my business in the bushes, much cleaner and safer, less chance of standing in your mess. Suggest you do the same in China, just squat by the side of the street. Other than that, eat immodium like they're smarties.

well I wasn't hiking and was in areas I would consider developed just not westernised.

Daniel wrote:

well I wasn't hiking and was in areas I would consider developed just not westernised.

So, what difference does that make?

Agree with Janek, I hate the bloody things especially the ones with no balancing bar. They're lethal unless you've got a great sense of balance. If you don't, well, you're literally in the shit!

I don't mind telling you I took my trousers off in the toilet in case I did drop my log into my pants thus creating the hammock styled poo. Difficult to judge the angle I found...

I hope you kept your shoes on? And more importantly put your trousers back on before leaving the cubicle?

yes, i did the old Lee step over as I took one off shoe and balanced on the foot with the shoe on and then slid the trouser leg off and then vice versa. I was then down to shoes, socks and pants and with the slacks hanging on the door. What an ordeal...

I guess you can count yourself lucky you had somewhere to hang your slacks. On second thoughts, count yourself lucky there was a door!

mind bleach please

Daniel wrote:

yes, i did the old Lee step over as I took one off shoe and balanced on the foot with the shoe on and then slid the trouser leg off and then vice versa. I was then down to shoes, socks and pants and with the slacks hanging on the door. What an ordeal...

I presume you are well-versed in this manoeuvre from your cottaging days in the toiles at Lakeside, Thurrock?

was that you I saw in there? Janek the Pole?

You wdn't have recognised me in the lycra Spider Man outfit, but it was I.

A few years ago my colleagues and I pulled together a 'top 10 worst toilets' list compiled from chinese ceramic factories.

The worst was Jinan Cotton factory ( i know, i know, but it really is a ceramic factory ) The squat down toilets had no friggen doors, nor was there a urinal so you had stand above a 'hole' just to take a piss. I couldn't get my head round the way factory staff were able to squat with no privacy, often reading a newspaper, without a care in the world.

It has to be said, most individuals find it much better to shit when you are squatting as your intestines are properly aligned so it comes out straight and 99% complete. When you do it sitting down, your shit gets all curved up and you tend to "FORCE" the shit out more than necessarily damaging the rectal walls and such.

tht's why i love INDOOR RECREATION CENTRE so much

Why is it after reading this hilarious thread again I have the sudden urge to have a crap ?

What a load of shit

Yeah, this thread is boring the crap out of me.

Agreed, quite frankly the whole thing stinks

Time to close the lid on this thread.

Quite how this has managed to generate 2 pages of discussion is beyond belief.

Daniel, just one final question. Out of interest was there Wifi in your toilet cubicle and did you manage to log on?

I'm just surprised that Biggles Butts hasn't regaled us with stories of his mile high craps during his various flights.

Come on Biggles, tell us about the other Mile High Club!