A suggestion for Pascal Chimbonda

Look here, you mercenary bastard. I'll forgive your lack of commitment to the blue & white if you actually bothered playing for the good money you're being paid. Fine, you've made no secret of being incentivized by nothing but the green, and we hate you for it. But if there's one thing you can do while wearing the colors and on the pitch, is to STAND THE FUCK UP. Straighten up, you hunched-over knuckle-dragging mouth-breather. Not only does it improve your posture, but you might be able to see better, at least over people. You might also be able to stride faster, instead of adopting that strange, scurrying gait which sends you straight into people. Stop the acrobatics; an attempted bicycle kick to endeavor to put the ball past your own keep would have been much better addressed by the likes of L'Oreal Jesus, who evidently can stand properly. And the unitard. Leotard. Whatever it is, retard. That's for ballet, not footie. Get rid. Best, Harcourt Road.

PS. Ditch the gloves. You're not the goalie. Ponce.

ONLY ONE L'OREAL JESUS----->